Today I took some cookies to the safety meeting. I set them on the table so that everyone could pass them around, then I went to find an open seat. The only seat left at the table was next to Billy Joe. This kid cracks me up. Not only does he have the name Billy Joe, he never, never stops smiling. The night before I left he was moving a drill collar from the catwalk to the rig floor and crunched the gate called the v-door. It didn’t even cause the smile to flicker. He spent the rest of the night enduring all sorts of teasing without ever toning down the wattage on his smile. This kid is also very nice, and probably the biggest hillbilly I’ve ever met.
Anyway, my seat was next to him today. When I sat down, he turned to smile at me.
Billy Joe: I was supposed to bring your tin back down to you this morning, but I forgot.
Me: I know, I had to walk all the way up to the rig floor to get it today.
Billy Joe: Yeah, I got chewed out by the driller and the toolpusher because I forgot.
Me: You should remember next time.
Billy Joe: I will! I’ll bring it to you as soon as it’s empty.
Me: Good, because if I don’t get it this time I won’t make more cookies.
(I just played on the roughnecks’ biggest fear here: NO MORE COOKIES! Ack!)
Toolpusher: He’ll bring it to you for sure this time, smelling like roses!
Me: Haha, I don’t care if it smells like roses, I just want it to be shiny clean.
Billy Joe: I can do shiny!
Today’s Exploit:
My sister has a very interesting logic behind most of her actions, logic that I usually don't understand. For example:
• We were sitting at Olive Garden, waiting for the waiter to bring the check. Suddenly she throws up her hand in salute and yells, “To the Bat-Cave!”
• We were driving down the road when suddenly she starts singing at the top of her lungs (her car radio doesn’t work)
All the women who are independent
Throw your hands up at me
All the honeys who makin' money
Throw your hands up at me
All the mommas who profit dollas
Throw your hands up at me
All the ladies who truly feel me
Throw your hands up at me
• At our first concert she would randomly shout out: “Save the environment, adopt!”
She claims that all of them have a good reason, but usually I don’t understand. The last one is the only one that had any context for me. While we were waiting for the gate to open we overheard a couple young girls talking (probably 14 or 15 years old).
Girl 1: I think I’m going to adopt
Girl 2: Yeah, I want to help the environment, so I’m not going to add another kid to it.
Girl 3: I don’t want the pain or stretch marks, either.
Girl 2: Me too. I know adopting one or two kids doesn’t seem like it makes much difference, but at least I’ll be doing something.
Girl 1: Yeah, I want to help too!
Girl 3: I don’t want to have kids or adopt; I just want to live in Africa.
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