Suspicious Activity: Walking

Countdown:  One more day gone, and I’m still not ready.

I discovered, or rather re-discovered the comic Cyanide and Happiness today.  It makes me laugh.  

Today’s Exploit:

I like to pace when I talk on the phone.  

Or clean, but that’s only in my own house with no one else around.

So, here, I pace.  I walk in circles around the room or lay upside down on the bed and walk my feet up and down the wall and around the corner.  Or the ceiling, if I have a bunk bed.  

But usually I go for long walks on the beach in the moonlight.

No really.  I go for long walks.  But the beach tends more to a dirt road and the moonlight is the glare of the rig.

This activity usually gains me little to no attention.  Once in a while the roughnecks comment on my walks.  But usually they only notice my runs because that’s when I wear shorts.

When I arrived at my current and most lovely rig to meet with Dirty Herb I decided a walk was in order.  I wanted to talk to my parents.  

So I took off down the road.

I walked and avoided the wind and talked and walked some more.  

Then a car came grumbling down the road.  So I moved off into the lovely green clover that was the side of the road.

The car stopped.  

I said hello.

The man asked me where I was from.

I told him.

My parentals thought I was being snotty and said, “Hello, Wyoming?”  

I talked some more with the man and the lady watched.  

Then they drove away.  

So I walked some more and talked some more and tried to avoid the wind.

Then another man came down his driveway and asked me who I was and where I came from.  

Then he backed back down his driveway into his garage.  

Next came the lady who flew past me to talk to the gate guard at the rig.

You see, they thought I was mighty suspicious walking along the road talking on my phone.  They thought I was casing the joint.  And telling my friends about the loot they had hidden under their couches.  

So, now I don’t go walking in the night.  I’m afraid next time they won’t ask questions first.  I’m afraid they’ll get out the big scary guns that every one in Texas, except me, owns.  I think they might shoot me for talking on my phone and walking down the lonely road at night.  

The end.

PS  I told Dirty Herb about this and he laughed.  He couldn’t believe that anyone could be suspicious of little ole me.  Specially since I have short hair now.  

Guess that makes me look even more innocent.  

Huh.